Questioning and Mornings

I've never been the kind of person to just take everything at face value. I've always questioned the motives of authority figures, questioned my faith and spirituality, questioned the social laws that we are all bound by. It tended to get me in trouble in school and sometimes at my jobs.

I've realized that this questioning personality of mine is not something I've ever really gotten away from. It's a blessing and a curse. I find though that people who make some mark in this world are ones who never really walked the beaten path and who always questioned externally and internally.

Internal questioning is probably the most important, and least detrimental. If I didn't question myself I would not be the person I am today. Anyone who knows me now and knew me 10 or more years ago knows that I am not the same person. I mean that in a good way. I've become less selfish, less bitter, and less angry. I've been able to let go of the hurt other people have inflicted upon me. Sure, I have scars, but they remind me of how bad things used to be and humble me now in the present.

External questioning does tend to get me in a muck of trouble at times, but at least I can learn from those experiences. This is a lesson I am frequently learning (and testing) the perimeters of. I tend to "poke the bear" to see how far I can push it. I don't necessarily do it intentionally, but I do. I suppose that is my natural stubborn streak part of me.

In other thoughts...I hate getting up early in the mornings for work. I am not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination. But the one thing I do love about my mornings is seeing the sunrise. It is beautiful and spectacular. Whatever stresses I have as I run out the door are quickly diminished when I gaze into the sky full of pink, orange, blue, and purple. Sometimes it's only a rich orange color and the trees are a raven black silhouette. It takes my breath away and makes me appreciate life every day. It also reminds me that I am very small and my problems are probably not that big of a deal in the long run.